It was only a few weekends ago that this concept was brought to my attention. I was talking with a friend about their definition of cheating, we went over the physical aspects of it and found ourselves talking about where you draw the line. When I talk about emotionally cheating I am referring to a romantic attachment with someone outside of your current relationship. You don’t always have to be physical to be unfaithful.
So how do you know if you are emotionally cheating? Well, I am going to help you out! Because sometimes it is very hard to recognise. Especially if you are the one part-taking in the cheating. So here are some things to look for!
- Becoming secretive and hiding things from your partner
So you might not be changing your passcode on your phone, but even just moving the screen out of your partner’s view intentionally is you being secretive. Hiding things such as casual meet ups and simply not discussing them with your partner can also be considered secretive.
- You begin to mention this person a lot more
You might just be talking about what they are up to on the weekend or how their family is, but talking about them more than usual is a good indication that there is a strong attachment between you both.
- You think about this person all the time
You’re at work and you’re thinking about them, you’re cooking dinner and you’re thinking about them, driving the car and still thinking about them. This happens when you’ve got a bit of a crush, am I right?
- You become disconnected
When investing time and energy into a new person that you really like, sometimes you can find yourself becoming disconnected with your partner and possibly others that you spend just as much time with.
- Your gut feeling tells you somethings wrong
You like the feeling that goes along with spending time with this person but you have this gut feeling that something’s not right? Well, chances are something’s not right.
- Your “friend” crosses the line and you encourage the behaviour
They suggest a hug and you go for it and later on that leads to them suggesting a sneaky skinny dip in the ocean and you sit there actually considering it.
- You are sharing more intimate things with this “friend” then your partner
Whether you are talking about the stress from work or the name of your secret dildo, opening up to this friend and sharing intimate things is also a sign that something’s up.
- You start to dress up for this friend
You spend Thursday night at late night trying on all different outfits just to find something different and cool that they haven’t seen you in before.
- You begin thinking about what would happen if your partner saw what was going on
You know that when you start questioning whether or not it’s right, that it’s probably wrong.
- You begin to feel dependent on the emotional high that this friend brings you
They don’t text back straight away and you get all worked up continuously checking your phone. You look forward to the meet up you’ve planned for the weekend and when it’s cancelled you feel really crap about it.
In most relationships people work on being open and honest with each other, not to mention exclusive. So if you catch yourself sharing too much with this friend of yours and these signs sound like you, it might be time to work out what is going on in both of these relationships for everyone’s sake.
Images: GIPHY (4)
WORDS: Abbe Bryant